Pregnancy and childbirth are overwhelming for the whole family, but the mother is affected the most in the process. New mothers have a hard time making a proper routine due to sleep deprivation, physical pain, emotional fatigue and many other reasons. While there are some men who voluntarily share the responsibility of handling a new born, most Indian women would agree that they did not receive much assistance from their husbands during the early days of motherhood, and also later on.
How can a man help the woman who gave birth to his child? Read on to know.
- Helping her during feeding
It is true that men cannot breastfeed. But they can (and should) offer help during and after feeding. For example, once the wife has breastfed the baby, the husband should take the baby and make him/her burp. An occasional back rub will make the mommy very happy too. If the baby is bottle-fed, the husband should know how to prepare bottle feeds and feed the baby, especially after he returns from office. These small gestures assure the mother that she is not alone, and go a long way in improving the relationship of the couple after childbirth.
- Helping her with diapering and bathing
Parenthood is all about learning new things, and no baby-related thing should be assigned to only one partner. Diapering and bathing the baby are regarded as rocket-science by many men, and most of them leave these tasks to the mother. This, however, should not be done. Even the dads should know how to clean the baby’s bottom, change the diaper and dispose it off correctly. The same holds true for bathing the baby, and dads should take this responsibility at least on weekends, or when their office is closed.
- Giving her some baby-free time
All moms love their babies. But this doesn’t mean that they have to be with them 24×7. Everyone appreciates some me-time and men can show their love for their wives by offering to baby-sit at least once a week, and letting her do what she wants during that time- whether going to the salon, for a movie with her friends, or simply taking a nap.
- Sharing the responsibility of running the house
Many things change with the arrival of the baby. Women who were deft at managing the house find very little time to do so after childbirth. Dads can tremendously ease the life of the new mom by offering help with some household chores. Men should realize that a managing a child is a full-time job and it should not be expected that the mom will manage the house alone, along with taking care of the child.
- Telling her that she is loved and wanted
This is the last point in this list, but it is perhaps the most important. Most women feel neglected after childbirth. It may happen because the family shifts its focus on the newborn and his/ her activities and milestones, but as partners, dads should make sure that the moms don’t feel unimportant or taken-for-granted. It is important to rekindle romance after childbirth, and if the woman doesn’t take a step in this regard, the man should. This doesn’t mean showering her with gifts, but simply letting her know that she is important.
These are the five most important things that men should consider doing after becoming a father. Do you agree? Did your partner do any of these? Do you have more to add to the list?
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Other than my formal training in life-sciences (in which I did my PhD), I am actively involved in following my passion for writing and crafts. When I am not spending time with my toddler, I read a lot and write on different topics as blogs, newspaper articles, short stories and poems. My articles are regularly published on a lot of online platforms. I love to explore different cultures and my writing reflects my opinion.